


Absolutes

by jenni3penny



Category: NCIS
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-27 10:30:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21390682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenni3penny/pseuds/jenni3penny
Summary: "She has to fight back, claw and scratch, even while smothered in the smell of their combined sweat. Even while panic claws its way up her throat and bites at the backs of her teeth, she fights." Anon requested Gibbs comforting Jack after a bad dream...
Relationships: Jethro Gibbs/Jacqueline "Jack" Sloane
Comments: 21
Kudos: 88





	Absolutes

She knows that she's stronger than they are, really. She's just got to hold on until help comes. Hold on and not give anything up...

(_They_ haven't given birth to a beautiful baby girl only to hand it to a stranger. Some things have to be let go of, some things make you strong just by making you the housing for a whole wide emptiness.)

She knows that in the long run, in the end she can be their ruination, their dead end, their faltering and fall-down-dead. If she can just hold on, hold on, _hold fast til help comes, Jacqueline._

(They've never bled, torn, thighs still parted and pale blind except to the ceiling above them. Her baby had cried as she had her let go, fingers aching as hard as her jaw. Her teeth near cracking in silence as she gave Faith up.)

She can't give up her faith.

Not if she wants to survive.

She can't lose faith (again).

Because this time she'd die.

***

This time she can feel his breath pant against her ear, a grunt of annoyance caught in her hair as his hands try clasping at hers, encircling her wrists.

She has to fight back, claw and scratch, even while smothered in the smell of their combined sweat. Even while panic claws its way up her throat and bites at the backs of her teeth, she fights.

She's been trapped here before, bent crooked beneath the weight of him. She's been pressed beneath his hands, hips, and harshness, choked into the floor with a mouthful of boot dust and -

"_Lieutenant_," his voice changes, accent stripped bare. His voice isn't malicious anymore, it's not nearly as viper-like, insidious. Now it's all just familiar force and something… safe. "Snap out of it."

Now it's a voice she knows, one she trusts. It doesn't make sense. She doesn't understand how it happens, how it works, how the monster becomes a man she trusts. "_Jacqueline_."

"They took Faith," she gasps against the side of his throat as she snaps awake, fingers scrabbling at the thin cotton of his t-shirt as his hands catch on her hips and jerk her close.

Her hands struggle against his chest, pressing to try and part them even as he hugs her closer by the waist.

She can still fight him, even if he isn't Masahun.

She can fight the man she loves if it means saving her daughter, having her daughter, keeping her (F)aith.

Gibbs shushes at her with softness, kissing comfort on her cheek as she tries to get oxygen in her lungs, her fingers unsure as her whole frame shivers and she pulls at his shirt. "Nobody took her, Jack. She's fine."

_How can he be sure?_

Her tears scald her skin hot and she pulls into him, feeling his entire right arm curl around her waist. He tugs her close and cradles her into his chest and her thighs tighten in tension, calves near cramping. Her body crouches inward, spring loading and clasped in on itself. "I have to find her."

His hand, its loving gentleness, is the only thing that stops her for a moment, it keeps her still as he speaks and holds her jaw. "She's fine, she's probably at home."

"I have to - "

"Hon, nobody took her." She wants to believe him as she studies him in half shadows and late summer heat. His face is all sharp angles as he squints at her, watching her turn. She escapes all the questions in his blue eyes by turning to the opposite side of the bed and reaching for her phone. "What are you doing?"

His fingers are under her elbow and at first she flinches under the assumption that he's going to try to stop her. "Calling the hospital."

"Jack," he whispers solemnly. "Let go of the phone."

She knew he'd try to take it from her but, _God_, maybe he's right… Maybe she shouldn't. Maybe she should wait… _Maybe_... "She's probably fine."

He just nods agreement, squinting to study her face as he brushes her hair back, fingertips light along her flushed skin. "She'll call you if she needs you."

"I don't believe that's true." Her eyes go black in the night, her hand loosening as he finally plies the cell phone from her palm. She knows by the quick upward flick of his eyes that he hadn't expected her to speak. She can see concern in the color of his eyes and the way it's darker than usual, clouded glass.

"Shhhh," comes whispered up along her jawline after a moment, his assurance gentle as he kisses it just before her ear. "Go back to sleep."

"She'd call… if it was something bad?" she asks, knowing she's likely wrong, knowing the phone probably won't ring. _Not tonight anyhow..._

"Of course," he lies (and it's the only time she can remember hearing his voice sound so specifically crumpled). "She'll call, Jack."

She's not so sure she believes in that as she shuts her eyes, _not anymore_... She's not sure what she believes anymore, if anything. In fact, the abdication of belief generally follows a substantial loss of faith. That's what she tells herself as she shuts her eyes, leaning back in bed and nearer to her nightmares.

(She can still taste the dirt packed floor as the dust crumbles in her mouth.

She can still hear her daughter squalling, her hands aching empty as she lets go.)

***

She aches just as hard in the morning, wrists tight and making her wince as she leans down at the dining table. She settles into the chair and catches on the fabric of his shirt as he steps closer to her. Her fingers tug at thin-thread cotton, head turning into his hip in embarrassment.

She groans an unspoken apology into his side as he palms his hand against the back of her head, the pads of his fingers rubbing heat to her scalp. The kitchen smells of good things and slow moving sunshine and she hasn't yet managed to clear the muddle in her thoughts, she hasn't managed to spit the taste of the past from her mouth.

"There's coffee," he offers with a voice that says she didn't keep them both awake all night with her dreaming. "Eggs?"

"Yeah," Jack nods, loosening her fingers from his shirt and then rubbing her face, avoiding his glance as she rubs at her eyes. She feels him step back toward the counter rather than watching. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize."_ Of course not, don't you dare._ "You want me to check on her? She doesn't need to know."

She doesn't doubt he could be surreptitious, that Faith would never know of his presence.

Her faith in him specifically… Well, it's _absolute_.

"No, it's all right," Jack whispers, rubbing against his hip as he sets her coffee cup and the sugar on the table in front of her. "It's… it's her birthday, Gibbs. Today is."

She still can't meet his eyes yet, even as he pushes her coffee closer. "Jack… _I know_."


End file.
